If you go back and read my previous posts you will notice I have never provided my ex-husband’s name. At first I chose to do this for a number of reasons. I was just starting my blog and putting my story out there. I felt and still feel at times, exposed and uncomfortable. Telling your story isn’t an easy thing to do, especially when you are still processing your own guilt and shame. I knew if I put Travis’ name out there, I would have to be ready to potentially face him. I knew he wouldn’t be happy with people knowing who he really is. I wasn’t prepared to handle all of that while still making sense of what happened myself.
I also used to be afraid Travis and/or his family would find out about Survivorhood and sue me for defamation and libel and for hurting his reputation. My response to that now is go ahead. Take me to court. Bring me before a judge. It will just provide me with yet another platform to tell my story. The thing about defamation and libel is, in order to be charged with it, the other party has to prove the information is false. Not only is every single thing I have shared on Survivorhood factual, it can be backed up with doctor’s notes and therapist’s records.
Today, I am no longer afraid. I have told my story enough times to realize what I have overcome. I have faced the repercussions of that relationship for 2,600 days today, with many more to come. The difference is, today Travis’ name will no longer be unknown. Today I place all of the baggage my loved ones and I have been carrying for those 2,600 days, because of him, back on his shoulders. He can carry it from now on. My shoulders are sore and tired.
***Please note that in providing his name, I do NOT condone any type of retaliation against him, his family or his friends. ***
Photo: Flickr – Axel Tregoning